Weekends

I suppose weekends is nothing special but some random holidays after a 5days of hell in school or college. For me it isn't. This weekends is like something special, some feeling of mine that I haven't been felt after so long. As usual Saturday is another day where I have to work especially my aunty took 2months holiday so leaving my mum and sister only. Much more help is needed there. compared to anywhere in my world. That's nothing cause that is what I am suppose to do.

Besides that, today is one hell of a long day. Get to sleep as much as I can and I feel sinful to do so. It feels like a waste of time to sleep this long when I have all the time to do things. After thinking awhile on bed I have nothing on hand so whatever it is I will just go drop down and die on bed. Whole day at house, nothing but rot rot rot and rot. Quite boring.

Luckily bought some books to read yesterday to fill in my time. Assignment on hand but is a group work so whatsoever if everyone else doesn't care about it who I care? Is a bad thing but tomorrow will complete it.

After bro went back to Aus, the room is left quite empty. Two single bed and I alone is sleeping one of it only. During the night it has became a habit to lock the door and turn off all the lights except the one I am using. It somehow tells my parents from outside that I am sleeping already since the light is off but I am still using the one at the back of the room to online and do nonsense.

I guess that's a random post from me since I am bored now.

So is already Thursday and one quarter of 2011 is about to pass. Nothing much to be mention today cause nothing much special.
I thought that today's CS class they will only teach osslt stuff for tml's test but who knows the lecturer did actually taught some of the codes and new concept and I missed that out. Tim texted me and snapped me up.
Didn't really eat much for dinner cause don't really have much appetite for it. It happens quite a lot of times for me already so is not really a big thing to be said since I got nothing much to type here.
Trying to keep things work hopefully it will be alright.
Anyways, might be going somewhere else tomorrow. Hope it will be productive. :)

So, I will try to make it a habit to post it here for whatsoever nonsense or things that I want to say when no one is ever interested in hearing it. Cause i know no one bother coming over here and read all my bullshit.

As I know ISU is coming and will be pretty busy in the coming days. Well not very busy but will have task on hand that need to be complete. Computer Science's ISU is to create a program of game if i am not mistaken. I am still very vague in this subject even though it has already passed 3months of lesson. I don't always get what is the theory given and how it applies. What more I am a lazy bump.
For IB, that will be way terrible or simple which I also dont know cause it is a group work and my group got like 5ppl including me. Hope it works out well. At the end of this ISU we still have to make a presentation for our product. Today I suggested to them that a book reader like thingy and they actually accepted my idea. What i was thinking is something that is affordable and widely used in the market. What is in my mind at that moment is that, when i look at the novel and my mind starts to think that how perfect and awesome it will be if someone would read it loud for me instead of me reading it myself and falling asleep slowly. and POP the idea comes out. Well all this nonsense is nothing. just something for me to rant over.
As I talk to zhen sern today, actually i find him as a very interesting guy. Talking to him I get to learn and see something in the conversation. Yes he might be a guy that has a lot of night life but I find him as a very special guy.

He started asking Amanda how long she has been best friend with krystal. Amanda answered him since they were in high school. After that he stopped asked and Amanda asked why he ask so. So there is where he explains. Hierarchy of needs. The need of companionship after achieving physiological and safety needs. There are still two more stage after companionship. He interrelate the friendship of Amanda and Krystal by using this term.

Okay finish craps. Done for today :)

payback time Xp

So today right, I followed somebody to her uni. Its not really my first time there but it's still as boring as ever what more I was having a little difficulty so it made time passed even slower. But because of her I would do anything :) since she only went there to do her assignments. Anyways back to story, So today in the morning I crashed her house then we went and have our breakfast as usual. Then headed straight to her uni. AFter everything , sent her home and there's probably all of it. OWH and today I don't know why but I'm very blur. I keep forgetting things. I think I must be getting old. :/

Well at times, I asked myself.
Is this really the life i want?
Is this really worth it?
Why am I always living in lies until I have to be one.
Am I too coward? or I just worried too much?
Does anyone out there understand what I am doing ?
Why am I always avoiding problems when it comes to me.

Maybe, after a period of time all of this will goes disappear.

Looking down the street, everyone has their problem in mind. The matter of facts how important is the problem to them and what consequences will come after them by the problems. Some are being disappointed by something because hopes are put in and nothing comes out is being expected. That applies in every where as i can see. Some people tried so hard to protect themselves from being harm and said things that couldnt take back. Some people tried so hard just to forget bout it by doing things that they think it would be the best distraction or even drunk themselves. There is also human that feel so regret just because he said something without thinking straight and after looking back only he knows that he is the worst nightmare for himself. Theory that can be understand so easily but he tend to make it complicated.
Nothing cannot be solve, just that it depends on what kind of way and how much a person want to give in. Yet, he always lost himself when he is in that situation. Looking back again he could have just think another way round. That's not the only thing he can do. He hated himself so much when he look back. A time machine perhaps? but that's not possible.
So what can be do is to learn , learn and learn everytime.
Whenever he learn something, he applies but until a certain time he forget about it. so he learn again. He wish he could have a whistle blower to blow him up whenever he feel like he is losing himself. My guess he just have to snap it out himself and make it a routine everyday.

I am like what, a dumb nut now? Calling me out just to fill in the space and all? What more you all want. I don't feel the same anymore. The feeling and the bond of me with you all isn't the same already. If you all realize that, i Don't even talk anymore. I prefer you all talk and i listen and pretend nothing happen cause I don't even get to cope up with your topic. FML okay. What more can i give you all. Giving you all tease for what ever I have said? is not once, twice but most of the time alright. Do I even still exist ? I am so lazy , so so tired of doing the middleman for nothing.
Absolutely many ppl would even think that why I doubt so much when things are always like this and why do i even mind now when i dont mind since from last time.
Human change, i got my own limit in everything. When i don't feel right i don't really talk it out of no use. Just don't go over my limit.